Dear Route 44 Dunkin’ Donuts,
Hey…how’ve you been? I’ve been doing okay, I guess. You may have noticed the new minivan. I miss the Camry, but at least we’re almost eye-to-eye at the drive-thru window now.
So anyway, I’m writing you this letter for a reason, so I better get to it. Do you remember the early days? I drove by your build site every day on my way to work, just to see how you were doing. Even as the construction crew was pouring your foundation, I knew we would have something special. Sure the new CVS next door was bigger and fancier, but you and I, we had a connection that all the advanced cold & flu remedies in the world couldn’t tear apart.
I’ll always remember your grand opening. You were all dressed up in those multi-colored used car lot banners and promotional Dunkachino signs . What a site! I remember leaning in close and whispering my order into your speaker box for the first time, “Number 2, iced coffee, cream and sugar, sausage egg and cheese on a toasted plain bagel.” You countered with “please drive up.”
The dance had begun.
When I pulled around to the window, you had my order wrong. That was our thing. Every day our relationship grew deeper, but you continued to get my order wrong. Wrong price, wrong food, wrong drink. It didn’t matter though, we were young and in love. I was willing to overlook your shortcomings just to be near your luke-warm breakfast sandwich goodness.
6 months later, getting the wrong order isn’t quite as endearing as it used to be. In and of itself it’s not so bad, but I’m starting to think this cumulative pattern symbolizes your true feelings for me. Sure it’s the wrong price today, but pretty soon you may be giving my order away to the car in front of me.
That would cut me to the core D.D.
I’m sure you’ve heard I’ve been driving by that McDonald’s over in Vernon. Sure the McMuffin can’t stack up to your bagels, and sure it’s out of my way, but it’s not about the convenience and tastiness anymore. I need more than that, I need a deeper commitment, and I think the Golden Arches is willing to provide that for me.
Listen, I’m ready to give you one more chance, but to be fair, I just needed to let you know how I feel. I think everything’s going to be okay from now on. Tomorrow, I’ll even bring exact change for you baby, just the way you like it.